I will totally update this later with pictures, promise*

*there is a 99.999% chance I will NOT actually update this post with pictures. But telling you that I will makes me feel better. So, sorry? 


So today was a bad day. Nothing too terribly awful happened, but it was a BAD day - start to finish.
I had to yell at kids. I didn't have the things I needed for today copied. Many parents had to be called. Children went home on YELLOW (first time all year for me to have to move a kid to yellow!). Children thought the bathroom was actually a jungle gym, and climbing on toilets was totally allowed (it's not). I kept my class in from recess.

BUT.

Because I kept them in from recess (in part because they were no good, terrible, bad, and in part because our scheduled holiday market time was during recess and the elves would have been mad if I didn't take my kids to spend their parent's hard earned money on crap thoughtful presents [sorry for the very long interjection]) I gave them 18 minutes of free time at the end of the day. We all needed it.

During this time some of my sweet angels drew me pictures. I gave them scrap papers and said they could use markers (free time = only time you can use markers) and so I was forgiven for yelling at them.

One of my sweet angels (who earlier in the day thought climbing on the toilet was the coolest thing ever) drew me this picture.

[Insert picture of picture, that I totally probably not update this blog with]

I looked at it. I could not figure out for the life of me what it was supposed to be. (this would make more sense to you if you could see said picture).

I said, "Oh how pretty. Can you describe it to me?"
She looked at me like I had 6 heads. This was free time. Not describe things time. Describe is obviously a reading/writing time word.
I tried again. Cuz I had no clue what this thing was. It looks kind of like an orange ax. With squiggles.
I whisper in my best whisper voice, "what is it?"
She said,"I don't know. I just drew stuff."
And I laughed. So loud and so hard. For like 5 minutes. Funniest thing since the stick joke.

I guess you had to be there. But I so needed that laugh.

in other news, a bulleted list.

• I tried to explain irony to 2nd graders today. I had no luck. But man was it funny. Almost as funny as watching them not 'get' irony. I then told them it was funny (and called irony) and they humored my by laughing fake laughs and whispering "I don't think it's funny" to each other. My kids love me so much they fake laughed! I love them so :) 
• This is STILL not the blog I meant to write before. Hopefully this weekend that will happen
• I have joined Match.com.  it's been 13 days and no one wants to marry me yet. In funny money news, my credit card DECLINED the charge initially and flagged it as possible fraud. Yea, explaining to customer service that yes, I did want the charge to "MATCH COM" to go through was slightly humiliating. Thanks for having my back? But no one stole my credit card to sign up for a boyfriend. (totally embarrassed). 
• My sister and her boyfriend get in town tomorrow. It is also her birthday. I tried to tell her it was her 22nd birthday. Apparently she is actually turning 25, and I told her this is impossible as it makes ME old. No such luck, I am old. 
• Tomorrow is also the 15th anniversary of the day we moved to Texas. I have now officially lived in Texas LONGER than New England. Do I have to turn in my Yankee card? 
• My brother (who is also old now) is taking his first round of finals next week. The way he is whining and going on about it on his facebook status you would think that finals are the worst hardest thing to ever happen to him, AND he is the first person ever to take finals. Poor baby...not.
• I hate everything about the new management at my apartment complex. Tomorrow I'm gonna complain my head off. Also, file a noise complaint on my downstairs neighbor who is currently shaking my house with his music. grr.
• GLEE totally used #WGP this week! Granted, Sam got it wrong and called them "rich white girl problems" but hey, WGP is getting out there. Happy. :) 

:) 

Still not the blog

Still not the blog I warned of in the pre-blog. But entertaining none the less.

1. I watch Chelsea Lately almost nightly. I love Chelsea Handler. I support most things she does. She's a funny smart lady. Now last night she had Whitney Cummings as her guest. Whitney used to be on the CL show. She was a round table regular. A CH pal. And she is a funny lady in her own right. She is producing 2 broke girls- one of my favorite new shows, and her show Whitney is ok (I don't cry if I miss it, but it's watch-able).  So WC is on CL promoting Whitney, and man was she COCKY! Yes I understand this is your bestie and you can relax, but don't act like you're some huge big shot. You used to be ON that show. Chill girl.

2. I was on iTunes on my phone (bad call ALWAYS) at oh 11 pm or so, from my bed, and somehow this happened.

From the Disney show SO Random -  MC Grammar with "The gift of grammar."
Yep. This song (not video) is now in my iTunes library.
At 11pm I thought it was hilarious.
I had thoughts I would let my kids listen to it. "A teaching tool!" I thought.


yea. Feel free to mock me now. :)

pre-blog

I have 2 things that are very blog worthy, but no time to properly blog about them. This is the pre-blog. The warning that eventually I will, in fact, blog about them.**

In the meantime, a super fun story.

I need/want a new watch. The watch I'm currently wearing I got when I was 18 (that was a bit of a time ago). I have replaced the battery TWICE this year. THIS YEAR, 2011. That's a lot. And it's not easy, it requires a trip to a jeweler and $18 average each time.
Today my watch was running 5 minutes late by the time the day was over. I re-set it sometime last week. The date is not keeping up with the date. Meaning, today is the 29th right, right now the window shows 28. It will change to 29 tomorrow at noon. This is incorrect. No matter how many times (at least 4 this month) I change the date at midnight, it takes a day and a half to change.

In short, my watch is only barely keeping correct time.

My wish list for my new watch is very simple.

bracelet type band (slim, sleek, looks like a bracelet, happens to have a watch. nothing bulky or thicker than 2/3 in.)
Numbers.  no dots, diamonds, dashes, or my least favorite- just 4 dots. I need to tell time QUICKLY. I need numbers.
Date. Please tell me what day it is, watch.  I don't need phases of the moon and all that jazz, but I write down the date several times per day. Need.
(Yes, these features -date and time in quick digital format- are on my phone. No, I cannot whip my phone out all day while teaching 2nd grade. Also, my phone gets negative service at school. not that this has any bearing on the time, just saying. I don't have it out. )

Tonight my mom showed me several pictures of watches she had picked as possible presents for me. Each one had a flaw. None were right.
She said (frustrated with my dislike of all her choices), "what is it you DO want!?"
My answer, "This EXACT watch, but WORKING (pointing to my current watch on wrist.)"
so easy. :)

Does fossil even make this watch anymore? someone remind me to look that up...


**yes, I realize that I could have just blogged about them instead of pre-blogging. But, you know. This story was good too.  :)

so later- real blog. k.

ugly mirror

I cannot listen to the Adele song "Someone like you" anymore. Don't get me wrong, it's a fantastically beautiful song, well sung with powerful lyrics. Too powerful. It is so all about how I'm feeling about asshat that when I hear it, it's like a big mirror to my life. A big ugly mirror and I do NOT like what I see. shudder. Don't you hate that? It's been a year since I decided to stop talking to him, and 3 months since he realized I stopped talking to him and needed me back, only to snub me once again. Jerk.

In the meantime, I have lost 10 pounds from my new year's weight. 10 pounds in a year  6 months, PLUS the 7 I put on in the 6 months or so I dated SJ. Another reason he was bad for me. *to be honest, I don't feel that different. I'm only down one pants size, and I still feel fat. I have a long way to go.*
So to celebrate my loss of 17lbs since May, I signed up for match.com.  Everyone else was doing it.

It's been a day, no one wants to marry me yet. I find this quite disappointing.

Will keep you posted.
(meanwhile, I got my first message in like 3 month on my pof account. I guess when you tell the universe you are ready - or rub the "F-You" stamp off your forehead as CS says- then the universe responds. He was a dud though. Still looking...)

no more kool aide

Day 60.
CAUTION- super crazy ahead. oh yea. you've been warned.

This has been a really rough week. Yes, it is only TUESDAY.  I forgot what this time of year was like in elementary. it's tough. I can't want for thanksgiving. mostly cuz I LOVE thanksgiving, it's my favorite. but we all need a break. apparently I need a break from my shift key.. I apologize but I'm too lazy to capitalize things. I'm waiting for my Word auto correct to take care of it for me, but it's not, cuz this isn't Word...so sorry.

I got news this week that my instructional coach at the middle school I used to be at where I used to work...
wait, no.  so this is how grammar crazy I am. even though I am not doing a super great job of capitalizing things, I totally just re-wrote that sentence. The sentence with nothing wrong you say? why yes.  "the middle school I used to be at," is not completely wrong, but my "where you at" aversion is soo strong, I HAD to go back and rewrite the sentence. I left the original so you could see. (I love the cross through feature). Yes, I'm a nut. And then, I told you about it. Like a crazy person. I need grammar AA.

anyway, moving on.

so my old instructional coach announced she is taking a position in another ISD as a promotion, and I emailed her telling her how excited I was for her.

Just a note.  when you get a promotion, and you announce it, and someone expresses to you that they are very happy/excited for you (when they didn't have to say anything) it is POLITE to RESPOND and say thank you. (cough cough asshat*cough). *remember like 4 posts ago when i said i was letting him go? yea i totally tried, but this is what happens when he comes back. i get emotionally wrecked, i try, i fail, sue me. I'm working on it. it's still common decency to respond. and not be an asshat.

ANYWAY, I spent quite some time carefully crafting my email, since i found out only because I'm accidently still on her group distribute list from last year and I didn't want her to know that. But i did profusely thank her for my amazing year last year. I hope she responds (like a decent human being, again, looking at you m asshat person.) cuz that would make me feel good.

In related news, when you read an email finding out someone's loved one has passed away it is POLITE to RESPOND, that you are sympathetic. it's called manners.  this is rude and bitchy and only in here since I am currently pms-ing hard core. Sorry.

I just got lost in my own train of thought and forgot where I was going. This has been happening to me a lot lately.


oh well.

so anyway, all the girls are wearing these adorable and totally covetable tutus to school. I am wicked jealous. there is no way my mom would have ever let me go to school in a tutu and tights, since tights are not pants, i don't care how old or young you are. I want to go back in time and wear one so bad. I was going to be a toddlers and tiaras pageant princess (ultimate grand supreme of course) for halloween, and bought a tutu, but I was sick with the mini flu (thanks flu mist vaccine!) and was in bed instead. missed my chance.

which brings me to my quote of the day.   coveting a 7 year old's outfit, I said, " I am tu-tu old to wear a tutu."  which was super funny to my class (and me). and prompted one friend to say, "39 isn't that old. you could wear one."   OUCH. Do I look 39? tomorrow is pajama day. I may wear a tutu instead.

good night moon.

p.s.  I don't have a tag for "super crazy" or "grammar nazi" (and I refuse to make one) so I'm filing this under White Girl Problems. enjoy.

*update*  my old instructional coach DID respond, since she is a good and kind person (STILL looking at you asshat.)
and yes, this post is disjointed. there was another paragraph at first but it involved school business so I took it off to you know, protect my job and all. so sorry. **

Day 51

Today was the 51st day of school, and at halfway to 100 days and report card/conferences done I can breathe for the first time since like day 15. I left school today before 4:30 for the first time I can remember.

So, all that is to say sorry I've been MIA. I will try harder.

Lots to say, but of course my fall allergies/sinus infection has hit me full force and I can barely function. I also got all scared of needles and opted for the flu mist vaccine instead of the shot and have been stuffy ever since.

And in case you missed it, my grandmother died last week, (most inconvenient what with the 20 mandatory report card conferences I had to do...) and that hit me pretty hard with less than zero time to actually process and cope.

I think I'm over the hump though, on the other side of half way through this semester.

see you soon friends.

Head above water

Sorry it's been so long, school has sucked me in.
My status on FB on this day in 2009 (p.s. how creepy is that feature!) said, "today is the first day I don't feel like I'm drowning. I must have forgotten something."

Ah first year of teaching... fond memories. haha. Today I still feel a little drowning-ish. maybe more like treading water. All my reading testing is done! (now I just have to analyze the results) and I came up with an amazing writing lesson on the fly yesterday. My kids are well behaved in front of others (the librarian gave us a compliment, which is like totally huge for me), and I only made a handful cry this week. ;) j/k!

Most importantly, I left school before 5:00 pm 2 days in a row!!! That must mean I'm forgetting to do something.. oh well. I don't know if I've mentioned it, but 2nd grade is hard y'all!

In other news, I finally broke up with my trainer (about a month coming, and with the help of Courtney since I am so non-confrontational), since I lost more weight in the past 2 weeks NOT going to the gym than I did in the 2 months he was being an ass to me training me. I have my first work out with my NEW trainer on Friday -- If I can keep up this current trend of leaving school.

Saturday I am taking Ashley to the Third Day concert for her early birthday! And am working on planning Mere's bachelorette party. :) Busy busy, so I apologize for my blog absence.

I think that's the wrap up.  If I can continue to tread water for another week I think I'll be able to get this whole elementary thing down.  And bonus! Early release day next week. :) Love it.

Love you, Miss you, will try to do better.

xxx
Sarah :)